Tuesday, March 17, 2009

libation

"priyata's blog

last update 4 months ago."

This is all i read when i surfed one of my pals blog. Its been long since I have walled myself. Blocked myself compeletly form the nuisance that the world got to offer. the only thing that started growing was a gluttonous and greedy me. I observed that the world has slipped into inanition. Life has taken me into a stand-still, and i observe this phase comes once in a year ( or may b more oft)- as if its my quiddity.
The world or the people itself are responsible for it. I was an extra-extrovert person a few years back. Carrying with me pocket-overflowing freind's. Now, its a megre number,moreover am becoming crowdphobic-the reason is either my isolation or my friends deprivation(or both).This is the outcome of- the extra jammed up schedule where sometimes I become a visitor for my ownself,responsiblity of time. Sometimes my sanguinity becomes an acute silence(it majorly happens when am supposed to be goo-goo-gaa-gaa),responsiblity of odd behaviour by people around me. Sometimes its the hurt which leads to a diatribe by me,responsibility of my extra-sensetive nature! And a mixture of various highs and lows of life which results to an adamant me.
The "cutting -off process" helps me look at the filth in the world in a better manner, which is understood by a chosen few people.
The people have a wonderful attitude to call the next-door person a nescience.It may be as small as to know my pencilbox color-if I hesitate or stay mum, there would be a consice and forceful discription of me as not-much-knowledgable.Day by Day discussions are becoming more of a show-off then knowlege sharing. Moreover the best thing to watch and laugh on is the attitude that people carry(i swear major amount of the existing world) , they show themselves to be Thee. As if they have been the creator,the runner, and would be the distructor of the world.The disposition that they carry makes me condole. On a still incisive eye I notice the anger,the jealosy and the will-to-dethrone the peermates.Each one japes on the other pedestrian on the walk of time. All the negetive actions, which are grandiloquent leave me in a state to howl. Slowly all this becomes irritable and I become liable.
All these discourteous acts which were sucking me into blackhole suddenly give me the upliftment to desorb this state of mine. And then there are a few tears (in context to the desorption), then an impetous frission and lastly a thaumaturgy which results to cheerful me....